Food for Thought

The Courage to Change

We all know change is inevitable, change can be a good thing, but it also can be a difficult thing and sometimes unwanted.

Change can help us grow, change helps us look at our struggles through a different perspective.

We understand that change needs to happen, changing a light bulb or the oil in your car is needed, those things we understand completely.

But what happens when change brings the unexpected, such as death, loss of work, losses of health, finances or relationships that we held closely to our hearts. How do we handle the changes that we don’t want, those painful ones? How do we accept the fact, we didn’t want that divorce, or becoming a widow, or the job we love has ended after years of dedication and your time invested into it? That’s a lot harder to overcome, and certainly something we cannot handle on our own. How do we see any goodness in change when we just have been devastated with a great loss?  Where do we begin again, how do we begin again?

I’m pretty sure the older we get the more we face change, when I had experienced the loss of my husband and many family members, when one of my contracts ended, the one enjoyed the most; changed happened, regardless if I wanted it to or not. It was change I didn’t want, trust me on that one!

But I had to except it, I got another job, that was good, but I also learned more about myself, why was I working 50 plus hours a week? No one should be working that many hours, that change taught me to re-evaluate my priorities, I couldn’t be everything to everyone, even if I strongly believed in the mission of the charity I worked with. It also taught me I wasn’t placing God first, or my family & friends second. It started consuming me, maybe even allowing my identity to be wrapped up in my job that is not healthy. But what about being a young widow, my life was changed in but a moment, what possibly goodness could come out of that? I can say it took a lot of courage to move forward, especially because I didn’t ever imagine my life without my husband or my children without their father.  The grief was overwhelming for all of us, I had no choice but to except the change of going from wife to widow, I could not control what had happened, and I knew I had two young children relying on me to help them through their own changes of losing a father.

It took courage to get up every day, and I can tell you I didn’t want to, because I also barred the responsibilities now of two parents. Changed forced me to accept, that I wasn’t in control of everything, it taught me to surrender, what I could do and couldn’t do. It took courage and strength, to move to a new province, find full time work, and leave my friends behind, I did so, because I wanted my children to be around their family, that’s another story for another time.

I imagined myself growing old with my husband and all the plans that we made would work out perfectly, that didn’t happen. But it definitely did change me, death changes us, I couldn’t understand back then how anything good could happen from it. But it has, it gave me greater compassion for others that are suffering loss, it gave me the opportunity to start a young widow’s ministry. And to minister to the broken hearted, it caused me to be courageous, and gave me strength I never knew I had. It also taught me to surrender to a power greater then me and understand that I am limited to what I can change. Change even out of our deepest pain can be our teacher, regardless if we want it or how much we resist it. There is one thing that I am sure of God never changes, He is our strength and He gives us courage to face our darkest, deepest sorrows.

Hebrews 13:8 ‘Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever’!

Maybe right now you are facing changes you never expected or even wanted to, maybe the loss feels like something you can never recover from? You can and you will, just not maybe the way you had planned. My heart and prayer are for you and with you, you will make it!

One last thought, Joshua 1:9, ‘have I not commanded you to be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened and do not be dismayed for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go’!

Shalom

Food for Thought

A Grieving Heart

Grief has a way of sneaking up on us, there is no time limit on it. I believe grief is one of the most powerful emotions that we can ever experience. The deep sorrow of mourning and loss, can take us to our knees, and I can say it has many times in my life.  The anguish of losing someone close to you is overwhelming, I’m not sure what insightful words I can offer but that it broke me.  It’s been 35 years today since I lost my young husband and father of my children.  And although I do not have the rawness and deep sorrow I experienced as a young widow, especially in the first months and years of Matt’s passing I still miss him. I’m a firm believer that only God can heal that deep sorrow, and I know that in my journey of being a young widow and single mother, it was God that gave me his grace and strength to keep going.

I felt like I was in a boxing match this morning, it was that unexpected sucker punch, that hit me, as grief knocked me for a moment, remembering the sweet man and father that was taken to soon. 

His birthday is the same day as my grandson’s, I can’t help but think that is not a coincidence. Our anniversary was in September, and although I have been healed from the rawness that grief brings his presence is greatly missed.

I reflected on all the things he missed out on, seeing his children growing up, walking his daughter down the aisle on her wedding day, trust me his absence was missed that day, as glorious it was; or experiencing the birth of his grandchildren. I cannot help but feel at times of being robbed of the privilege of growing old together, of losing all our dreams and plans at this time in my life.  

And although I write this message for all those who have lost someone, I write this particularly to all the young widows and widowers. Your journey is difficult, no one expects to lose a young spouse or become a single parent in such a tragic way. I can share that there will be a day that the pain is not so raw, that your memories of your husband or wife, will be treasured ones. My heart hurts for you, and I offer my thoughts and prayers to you. I recently wrote a blog called ‘A life not forgotten’, it was written in memory of my young nephew that passed away last year at the tender age of 39. As I know full well the road ahead for my young niece, and her children. Death has a ripple effect, on all those around us, as did my nephews, of his parents that lost a son, and a brother who grieves the loss of his big brother’s presence.

There was a quote that I loved by Pieces of Soul, ‘Grief is like glitter, you can throw a handful in the air, but when you try to clean it up, you will never get all of it. Even long after the event, you will still find glitter tucked in the corners. It will always be there somewhere….

Emotions are like dominos, pain, anger, fear, anxiety, depression, loneliness, heartbreak, feeling overwhelmed, it seems like the list is endless. In those times I pray that, the Lord carries you, those moments you feel overwhelmed, may He sustain you when you feel you cannot carry on, may you feel His comfort and presence in the road ahead.

And I will end with this thought, Revelation, 21: 4. ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be morning, nor crying nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away!’

Shalom

Food for Thought

I’m Overwhelmed

As I sit quietly this morning focusing on the love and sovereignty of God, I have to admit I have been overwhelmed lately, the news of death, sickness and job loss cannot be ignored but it’s not what I want in my thoughts all the time. As I sit here praying, for my family, friends and our country, I just received a message from a friend of mine, that her mom is very ill. I can only imagine how overwhelmed she must feel regarding her precious mother. I lost my mom four years from cancer, I still miss her. I thought last year was a tough one with the loss of my brother and young nephew, I don’t want to even say what I think about this one!

But even in saying that, this song kept coming to my mind, I’m Overwhelmed by you by Big Daddy Weave, it’s such a beautiful reminder that we still serve a sovereign God; that loves us despite the madness and state of our country, our world!

These lyrics hit me as I listened to such powerful words, “I know the power of your cross, forgiven and free forever you’ll be My God and all that you’ve done is so overwhelming”!

I just want to sit for a few more moments before I run and do my daily errands, writing and appointments. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by circumstances that I cannot control, I want to be overwhelmed by His presence and promises, He will never leave or forsake us. He is still sovereign, that hasn’t changed, regardless how things look or how I feel. Isaiah 41:10 “Fear not for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

We all are given a choice to believe there is someone or something greater than ourselves or in control of all our outcomes or not. I can only do my part, but for this moment I choose to bask in the presence of someone greater than myself, someone who has never changed and feel the presence of a sovereign God, that loves me and who is for me. A God that has never ever failed me, is constant, consistent and most of all a God of love or I can feel overwhelmed by things I cannot control.

I sit in the stillness of His presence and ask Him to overwhelm me with His comfort, love, hope, I chose to focus on someone far greater than I, far greater then my circumstances.  “Isaiah 26:3 “You show me the way of life, granting me joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever!”

He loves us, He is in control, focus on His presence, He is overwhelming!!

Shalom

Food for Thought

We Are Our Mother’s Daughters

It’s been four years since my mother’s passing and I still miss her, I always will. It wasn’t until the last few years of her life that our relationship changed. I could see her through a woman’s eyes, a healed woman and not a child’s who longed for her mother to approve of her. I didn’t have that growing up, my mother was a broken woman, I believe she did her best, but her lack of nurturing and care, and love for herself was evident. I remember praying and asking the Lord to show me my mother through His eyes, and give me a love for her in my heart so I could forgive her and pray for her. He did that, but as a child we don’t see that, we only see and feel the absence of love from a parent. Words can be painful and destructive, and when someone is broken and has no love for themselves, at least a healthy love for themselves, they will never have a healthy relationship with anyone.

I learned to accept that I didn’t need my mother’s approval I had my Father’s, not just my earthly father but my heavenly Father’s. As I discovered more about His love, and began to learn what a healthy self-love really was. My mother lost her beloved mom at the age of seven, that kind of tragedy and loss shaped her. Being a widow at the tender age of 32, I could connect in the loss of a husband and father. I do not excuse the abuse that took place as a child but I have learned to forgive it. In Isaiah 63:13 “As a mother comforts her child, I shall comfort you”!

There was a quote posted recently on social media stating “: To my children, I’m sorry for the unhealed part of me than in turn hurt you. It was never a lack of love for you. Only a lack of love for myself”.   

I have learned to rely heavily on God’s love for me, and how He sees me, it took a lot of healing and work not to repeat the same mistakes my mother made with my own children. It took a lot of sacrifice to lay everything down and raise two good children, imperfect but caring human beings. I believe my mom did indeed love us to the best of her ability, but I think that is the point we need to rely on God’s ability through us to love ourselves and others. 1 Corinthians 13:13 “And now these three things remain; faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love”.

My mom and I had many interesting conversations on the phone, I got to pray for her send her books and write letters to her. When I saw my mother as God did, I saw a little girl who must have missed her mother immensely, no one to speak with, back then those conversations just didn’t happen. I asked my mother many questions about her childhood, a topic she struggled with. She shared with me that as a child there were things that they just didn’t speak of, or were allowed to speak about. I often wondered did anyone ever notice my mother’s grief, she had six brothers and a father that had seven children to raise, something tells me that if they couldn’t even discuss the pain of loss of a mother and wife, then how did anyone notice a broken little girl that longed for her mother’s love?

I got to spend time with my mom before she passed, I saw a frail woman that had such a desire to love and be loved. We all need that love, approval and acceptance, we get that from our heavenly Father. He is love and He designed us to love ourselves and to love others.

My mom got to know her heavenly father before she passed away, she had His approval, she changed but so did I, forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves, so we do not live life with pain and bitterness in our hearts.

Perhaps, you may have had a parent or parents that were far from perfect, and you may have not received their approval but you do have a Father that loves you unconditionally, you have been approved and found favor in His eyes. He is our hope, trust Him to walk you through healing and forgiveness I promise you He never fails.

Romans 8:38-39 “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the past nor future, nor any powers, 39: neither height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Shalom

Food for Thought

Stripped to My Very Soul

There is something about going through the fiery trials of adversity that not only changes us but draws us to the very heart of God. Difficulties challenges us, overcoming them builds self-confidence, teaches us self-control and we have far better understanding when others around us are hurting.

And as much as I would love to avoid it, because there is nothing really pleasant about the pain and sorrow of losing a young husband, a father, mother, step mother, sister in law, young brother in law, and recently my brother and young nephew. That didn’t include, health issues, financial issues and many other trials. We all will face them, we all will have them it’s learning to survive and overcoming them that creates in us our resilience, our strength and adversity develops our character. It creates a deeper trust in God, draws us closer to him, it stretches our faith and dependency on him.

I have walked through many trials, I assure you it wasn’t by choice, and there were times that I thought I would never get up again. In fact there were plenty of times I didn’t want too. I felt stripped to very core of my being, raw, broken and wondering why, why did such suffering happen to me and my family. Sometimes God seems silent, in our sufferings, there were many questions I had, and I always didn’t get an answer to those questions. I sometime think life is like an onion, with multi-faceted layers, it takes a lot of stripping away to get to the very core or heart of the onion. We are complicated human beings, sometimes those things that we thought would break us, actually created in us the very character of God.

It is understanding how to overcome our trials, I’m not sure I have any quick insightful answer for you. I know when I have gone through adversity, I had to examine my own heart, I learned to meditate on God’s word and hold onto His promises. It grew my faith, and renewed my mind.

That didn’t mean I haven’t doubted, I haven’t got angry, I haven’t wanted to quit, because I have. I wasn’t running around doing a the ‘happy dance’, there were times I didn’t want to get out of bed, I wanted someone to come rescue me, I just wanted the pain to stop. And there were times God did pull me out of painful situations and there were plenty of times He didn’t.

But it was in those times, when I learned to depend on Him totally. He is true to His promises, and He has sent some wonderful people into my life to walk beside me.

But there are times, in those valleys of adversity we walk alone, He is never far behind or in front of us. I heard a great sermon today about different seasons in our lives, we have to be able to recognize each season, I’m not sure I always clue in right away. But I’m sure glad when I come out of out of those painful ones, the ones when we get to stand on the mountain tops again. I appreciate even more the blessings that God has given me, my family and friends. My faith was made stronger, maybe on those mountain tops we can look back and see how far we have come. I know there will always be those valleys, but I also know I serve a God that has never changed. He loves us, He never will leave us, His word and promises will remain forever. He wants to get to our very core (heart) of who we are so we become more like His son.

Deuteronomy 31:6, 8. ‘Be strong and bold, have no fear or dread of them, because it is the Lord your God who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed’.

Trust Him, He has already overcome. Shalom

Food for Thought

A Daughter of the King

In a world of selfie’s and labels, we can get lost in a battle of comparisons. I’m not a selfie person, I will leave it at that.

But there is a world of difference in having a healthy self-love for yourself, and being self-absorbed, with the constant need of approval and admiration. We all have struggles with self- esteem and self-image, people’s words and labels can take a toll on us if we are not grounded in understanding a healthy self-love and care for ourselves.

Let’s face it we live in trouble times right now, sometimes it’s a battle every day to stay positive, then you hop on social media and hear all the negativity  & nonsense. I honestly think people need an escape so they choose to either sink back in defeat or become absorbed in comparison.  There is a great need to be heard, worthy and find a place where you belong. News flash; it’s not social media! Your self-worth is not measured by trying daily to post everything about yourself, everything you eat and everywhere you go. I think you are far more worthy then that.

I’m not speaking of having the occasional picture, especially with family and friends that will become a wonderful memory one day. I mean thinking you are less than and measuring yourself by others opinions. Self-confidence comes with in, knowing who you truly are and what and why you have been created. So in these tough times, you measure yourself by the very one who created you in the first place.

Wow, if we listen to the voices around telling us what we are we will give up, God created you to be his daughter and child, forming you in the image of His son.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made Psalm 139: 14– ‘I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.’

1 John 3:1 ‘See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be children of God! And that is what we are! Zephaniah 3:17, The Lord your God is with you, the mighty warrior who saves. He will take delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.’

I decided to stop watching the news, and lessen my time on social media, it’s hard to distinguish fiction and fact anymore. Quite honestly, I would rather read, write or listen to positive messages and music. I would prefer to pray, for my family, my friends and all those things that grieve the very heart of God!

I know you may be struggling today, we all have our moments, please remember you are far more worthy than you believe. Focus on the truth of who you are, and why you were created. God wants nothing more than the very best, his best for you.

So the next time, you question your self-worth, or value, remember you are the daughter of the King.

So girl, straighten that crown, shoulders back and walk forward, knowing you serve a loving God and He has created you for greatness!

Shalom

Food For Thought

In Pursuit of a Holy God

We definitely are living in chaotic times, times where we can be easily distracted by all the negative information, and trying decipher what is really true?

I will be honest with you, I decided not to watch the news on TV at all, I limiting my time on social media, I do believe there is a time to stand up and speak, but I also believe there is a time to be silent and use my energy for praying.

I just want to focus on aligning my thoughts with positive messages and pursue the very things that set my mind and heart free; of worries, of things that I cannot change, and to understand there are few things we have complete control of. We don’t need sugar coated messages but we do need to hear of God’s love and sovereignty.

Maybe, pursuing the very things of God; such as His holiness and instead of following all the chaos and perhaps we should be taking His message of love to a fallen world?

I have had many conversations over the last few months about where is God in all this? How can He allow this to happen? Why would God not stop this? I do not always understand God’s ways they are far above mine. But I do know one thing God does has not changed He is forever the same, He is a loving God that pursues you and I.  Even as I focus on the many attributes of God, He is unchanging, omnipotent( all powerful)omniscient(all knowing), sovereign, an endless list. But most of all a God of love, we seem to have forgotten God gave us a free will, maybe that answers a few questions about why God…

There is something very comforting about pursuing Him daily, knowing regardless of how things look He is still in control, and knowing He pursues us as well.  I love the book of Psalms, one of my favorites is Psalm 139, and this is a very personal Psalm to me. I love Psalm 139: verse 7, “where can I go from your spirit, or where can I flee from your presence? Or verse 5: You have hedged me behind and before, and laid your hand upon me.

I’m sure there have been moments, I have wanted to say things but ended up deleting my comments, and there has been moments I have gotten caught up with things that are dear to my heart, that also grieve the heart of God. And those days that seem overwhelming, I need to be in his presence, and pursuing His comfort and peace. I find solace, just knowing He has never change nor will He.  A very present God, that constantly pursues us, let us bask in your presence and grace Lord! May we take comfort in knowing you are a unchanging God.

Shalom

Food for Thought

Dealing with Betrayal

Betrayal hurts, there is no wrapping my head around that, how do we handle the ultimate betrayal of someone we once considered a close friend and confidant. I’m not comparing the ultimate betrayal that Jesus had when He knew Judas was about to betray Him, even though it would cost Jesus His life. But Jesus forgave him, how do we get to that part of forgiveness and letting God heal us? I struggle with confronting this issue or letting God deal with them and me. I don’t like harbouring unforgiveness in my heart, it’s not good for us, as the likely hood is the very person that betrayed you isn’t necessarily thinking about you or what they have done.

There are many questions, do I speak with them and confront the issue, ask them what was said or do I let it go? I know the last thing I would do is confront when I’m hurting this much. It could have horrible consequences and cause much more pain for both of us.

But hanging onto something can cause us to become bitter and resentful, I don’t want to live like that either. How do we see what Jesus sees in others and the love that He has for them? Somehow I don’t think this is an overnight process, and sometimes the best thing is to step away until we are in an emotionally better place. A place that we can see that person through the eyes of forgiveness without the pain attached.

Maybe that is for a season, or maybe the end of a friendship, sometimes things are allowed to grow us, and move us forward to what God has called us to do. Perhaps, the season of friendship has come to end and never was supposed to be for a life time, there are few friendships that are.

Maybe it is to learn more about ourselves and to lean on God more than ever before, sometimes it’s time to let go of a friendship, as hard as that can be. I know we all are human, we have frailties, and we are all quite capable of doing and saying things even when we are not trying to hurt someone else.

Perhaps there is something in us that needs to change and we need to look at ourselves as well. But when we are in the mist of the pain, it perhaps a time we cling closer to God, to explore the truth about ourselves and see what God sees through His loving eyes. I’m not God, and there are days that is pretty obvious, but I have and will always go to Him and ask Him to forgive me and change my heart. I will also own it, it’s not a good feeling if you have hurt someone even without intention. I also know there are many times I have hurt the heart of God, and most likely grieved His spirit. I know He forgives when we truly repent and continues to work on us.

But in our human capacity, that can be a longer process, I want to heal and forgive, I desire to do so, to be free of the burden that unforgiveness takes on us, and pray that for the person who deeply wounded me, so they also can be free of whatever has caused them to be broken. Some people choose not to ask for forgiveness or are completely unaware what pain they have caused. The thing is we have to be okay with that as well.  Maybe we can get to a place of reconciliation or maybe we just bless them and move forward.

A verse from the book of Mark, came to light this morning as I sat and prayed and ask God to help me deal with this. Mark11:25 ‘And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses’. That’s pretty clear, so now I ask the Lord to walk me through the process of forgiveness and healing. Maybe I will sit here a little longer at His footstool, and feel the cleansing love of His presence and the peace that I so seek with Him. Shalom

Food for Thought

In Search of Hope

I believe now more than ever, we are searching for hope, believing there is someone greater or even something greater that will come out of the chaos happening in this world right now. Maybe just maybe the answers we seek and the hope we search for is in all of us, a seed of hope divinely planted?

I decided to look up the definition of hope, and to understand the difference in faith and hope, faith is the confidence or trust in something or someone not based on proof, believing in the unseen. Hope is an optimistic attitude based on expectation or desire.

Our thoughts can be quickly consumed with all this negative information we are listening to, so many voices, people being devastated by circumstances they cannot control. As much as we cannot ignore the things that are happening right now, I cannot or will not allow this to consume my thinking or taking too much energy and time up in my life, day to day, and moment by moment.  

In times when I cannot see the answers clearly or doubt enters my thinking, I go back to God’s promises, His word and remember there have been many times in my life that I have felt overwhelmed and didn’t know what foot to put forward but I also remember the many times I have seen His promises come to past, so I go in quiet solitude, pray and read once again through His word. I also understand in our humanness & frailties, we sometimes forget what He has done before, and will again. He hasn’t changed, he still is a God of love and hope.

Romans 15:13 ‘May the God of hope fill with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy spirit.’

Perhaps if anything this time has shown us, that our hope lies in so much more than what we see and feel, there are so many questions, so many searching for answers that are greater than our own knowledge. It is belief in what could be, hope redefines what is probable and opens to the paths for the impossible.

Hope allows us to believe in some way that even in a tough situation will be okay and things will work out, and that when we feel overwhelmed, and on the verge of giving up, we still cling to the hope of a better tomorrow.

 Psalm 71: 5 “for you oh Lord, are my hope, my trust O Lord from my youth!”

Shalom

Food For Thought

A Life Not Forgotten

It will be over thirty years, this November since my husband passed away at the very tender age of 40, of a massive heart attack. Nothing could have prepared myself or my children for such a tragic loss. Death forever changes us, we have never been the same. No one is, even though death may be inevitable, when you are suddenly dealing with such tragedy the life you once knew has been completely shattered.

As I also reflect on the passing of my young nephew last October, it’s been hard to wrap my head around the fact it’s been a year since his passing. He left behind a young wife, with young children, a mother & father, brother & sister in law, and so many others who loved him dearly. Their lives as well were changed in but a moment; a scenario that I understand all too well.

Even after all this time I’m not sure, if I truly have the words to express the sorrow I feel for such a loss of someone so very young. I do understand as a widow the road that lies ahead. There are few words, to describe the first and even second year, of trying hard to move forward, and pick up the pieces of a life that has forever been changed.

Being a parent is tough, but even tougher is being a single parent. Trying each day to get out of bed, is difficult, but when you don’t really have a choice because there are two young children who are counting on you. Dealing with their own fears, of loss and clinging even tighter to you because they are terrified something may happen to you as well.

My heart aches, for my family, I wish I was closer, instead of provinces apart. But they are never far from my thoughts and always in the prayers, I want to be supportive but also respectful because every death is different, and everyone grieves differently.

I keep in touch with all of my family, especially my niece, offer whatever I can for support, and let her know I’m here, praying, and sending lots of love. I’m so very glad she has a wonderful family and great friends that have supported her. But as life goes, everyone goes back to their own lives, and we are left to slowly pick up the pieces of our shattered lives.

As many years have passed since my own husband’s death, there is no amount of time that can heal that wound, of a broken heart and life. Only God can truly heal those deep, deep wounds of sorrow. The truth is grief is forever, there is a piece of Jeff that each of us get to keep,memories of a sweet young man that left way too soon.

I have no eloquent words to offer, I’m sorry just isn’t enough. All I can to say is, I hold all of you, in my heart each day. The memoires are far too fresh and way to painful, right now but as time passes those memories of our loved ones will always be etched in our hearts. They reflect in his children & wife, his parents, and his brother, sister in law, family and his friends.

Even after all this time, I see my husband in our children, and now in our grandchildren (even though he never got to meet them). I’m a true believer, that God heals all wounds, not time. That it is He, who gives us strength to carry on, that He is with us each moment of each day. I wish I could hug each of my family, and let them know I’m here and deeply care about the sorrow they are going through.

I don’t know what heaven is like either than mention of it in the Bible, one description is in the book of Revelation, 21: 4. ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be morning, nor crying nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away!’

Maybe I envision, Jeff, Matt and my late brother Grant all playing hockey together, a sport they all excelled at. Maybe that’s stretching it a bit, but I’m so grateful that I got to love them and now carry their memories in my heart. I know that doesn’t give solace to where my family is right now, I understand that, the pain is so raw and fresh. I do know one day, which right now seems impossible, they will be in a different place. Grief is forever, our lives do change, but so does the pain. I cannot speak to loss of a son, in fact I pray I never have to. But I truly know that some days may seem impossible, the sorrow, mourning and grieving are so overwhelming.

The sorrow I feel for what you have gone through, and will go through, is heavy, but not too heavy for God’s shoulders.

To my family; I can only offer, my love and prayers, and an ear to listen if you need one, you are so greatly loved by myself and my children.

And by God, may He carry you those moments you feel overwhelmed, may He sustain you when you feel you cannot carry on, may you feel His comfort and presence in the road ahead! Shalom

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